Noses...

Today I have the best company in the whole world right by my side...my sweetheart. He had surgery bright and early this morning on his nose. He got a nose job....no, I'm just kidding. He has a seriously deviated septum and needed to get it fixed. I was so sad waking up this morning to a quiet house knowing that my best friend and husband was in the hospital and I couldn't be there for him when he woke up. I obviously can't do much for him, but I'm so grateful I get to be here to welcome him home, help change his bandages and hold his hand. We are so lucky to have Doug's Mom in town to help us out....we are a pretty pathetic pair today! Thanks LaVon!

I have been very surprised at the adjustment it's been for me to come home from the hospital. I thought it would just be a great big relief and I would be ecstatic from the moment I walked in the door! You would probably think that too.....right?!?! Well, it actually took a few days...and to be honest, maybe a few more after that. Maybe it was the fear and worry of the unknown possibilities that made it hard. Maybe it was the pain and discomfort, or just the frustration that comes with the fact that you should be all better when you leave the hospital - not the same. Actually, I think it's all too complicated to go into the details of why on Earth it would turn out that way...it just is what it is. I've come to find that I'm just a big roller coaster right now-up and down and all around - and this journey is the ride you get on and then as you are strapped in you are also fitted with a blindfold....you never know what to expect. We've adjusted and regained our balance. I can't even say it with words that express the feelings projected behind this statement....we have been soooo incredibly blessed by the Lord to have this child still safe in my belly. How grateful we are for the miracles we've seen! As I lie here next to a sleeping and healing Doug I've been thinking about Faith and Fear....I just read a talk by Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin. Here is just a little snippet....
"Fear can make us run away from things—things like setting and achieving goals, developing relationships, or becoming the people we know we should become. Sometimes fear can even paralyze us to the point that we don’t even try.

Fear can be a thick fog that smothers our dreams. It can be a cage that restrains us from reaching our destiny. It can be a weight that restrains our every step.

We may not be immune to being afraid, but we do not have to succumb to it."
"Therefore, fear not, little flock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are built upon my rock, they cannot prevail." (D&C 6:34)

We all feel fear. It manifests itself in various forms and might weave us blindfolded up and down and all around, but we know that with the Lord we will always find ourselves peace and safety at the end of the ride.

Today I'm grateful for my nose, no matter how bumpy my bridge may be. May Doug's heal quickly and his breath forever be effortless...